The Newspaper of Record for Degens
The chaos, the culture, and the candlestick charts of the Pump Fun ecosystem — covered with all the gravitas of the world's finest financial press and none of the financial advice.
Millions of tokens have been created, traded, and extinguished on Pump Fun's bonding curve since early 2024. Real capital moved through every one of them. A culture formed around the wreckage. And yet nearly every voice describing this market has held a position in it — holders, promoters, and the occasionally anonymous developer, each with a bag to defend.
The Pump Fun Times holds none.
“We do not pick coins. We do not give financial advice. We simply watch the chaos unfold — and we write it down.”
The numbers are real. The stories are real. The people are real. A market this large, this strange, and this fast has earned the one thing it has never had: a disinterested record. That is the entire ambition here — accurate, consistent, and occasionally dry reporting on one of the more extraordinary financial ecosystems of the era.
We own no tokens and will sell you nothing. The first edition follows.